broken

my eyes are broken just like eijii's ears, it's uncontrolably releasing liquids. but like something normal my liquid excretion is triggered by something. in this case it's eijii's blog entry... the emoness... this sucks.

i know i'm not gonna leave manila happy. i've embraced that fact last thursday when all of this emoness started, i know i'm gonna be depressed for the next few days. i know not even an overdose of drugs is gonna make this depression poof away...

my friends and i have seperation issues... for some odd reason i'm getting the 'i will never see you again why are you leaving' treatment instead of the 'i'll miss you but we'll see you next week' treatment... i think there's a mixup. oh well we're warped.

i hate crying but for some odd reason i like this emoness right now... gives you this huge hug and a feeling of being luved... i like experiencing this once in a while but if it happens frequently my leaking eyes and soon to be leaking nosdrils are not gonna be able to take it.

i'm happy the my friends are happy everytime i make crazy plans or i make gatong to their obsession. i'm happy when they are happy. plus i'm happy that i'm the one who is making them happy... the word happy is kinda weird now saying it so many times... happy happy happy happy. weird ne?

i'n a few hours i'll be in the car starting my college journey,i'm excited scared and depressed. mixed emotions much. at least i'll have some pictures to take me out of depression... hope that works.

eijii: you don't know how much liquid my eyes excrete everytime you go emo mode on me. specially the part of me making you fangirly happy and you love me more than you love me more than you love sungmin... oh and the impakta part helps haha. i'll miss a lot of stuff.. specially the everynight/day ym conversations. but i'll see you everytime i'm back. plus most of the time i think we'll have plans. quiapo and buisiness things hehe..

rin-chan: i'll miss our constant everynight talks... jumong will only be a one night event instead of the 5 night fun hour. we'll still have allnighters on weekends right? plus we'll see eachother when we have plans and stuff... the condo thing... haha the only pic you don't have is kibum hankyung(which i don't have also) and heechul right? hehe... i'll find a way to give it to you.

my luggage is set. 3 bags, a paper bag, a suitcase and some other stuff... i'm leaving home... i'm starting to embrace the change of not being able to pester my family 7 days a week. but i think that's good. i'll give them a time to reflect how much the love me and stuff. i know our house is gonna be hell of a lot quieter despite the constant jeepney and motorcycle noises.

my sister would miss me, no one else can make her laugh in this houshold except me. no one makes here angrier too.. haha. i love her so much. i'll miss the constant bickering and the shouting.

my brother... how could he survive? haha... he worries too much. but i think it'll be okei..

my parents. let's just say that they won't notice the difference much since they're always playing cards so yeah...

*~ciao for now

niXXie

se7en loves me and i <3 him

damn... i need endorphins...

for those who don't know endorphin is a chemical released by the body everytime you excercise or everytime you get a deep physical wound i think...i'm right but it worcks as a pain killer... it's supposed to make you all giddy and full of happiness... haengbok... i need that... i desperately need that now... sadly there is no way i could excercise because of what i'm feeling and as for the wounds... i've been clean since my addiction i don't wanna go back to being cutter dependent everytime i hit a road bump...

the reason for the sudden depression? i'm going to lb in saturday. even though i'll be back in manila every weekends... i'll miss a lot of stuff.. i'll miss people... i'll miss eijii and rin-chan... the latenight phone conversations and instant messages. the gatungan and kilig... everything... what makes me think of all this now aside from the fact that saturday is just around the corner is eijii's ym stat message earlier...

it made me cry... it made me cry damn hard. and everytime i remember it tears start to well in my eyes... and hearing the trax's song 'sad wedding story' isn't helping me to prevent tears...

"i don't wanna cry, crying makes me scared, i don't wanna be scared... being scare makes me wanna cry...~"

no matter how much i don't wanna cry i can't help myself.. i'm scared of changes. scared of not knowing what tomorrow might bring... i'm scared of giving up a life in which i'm already contented and happy. i'm scared of exchanging what i have now with something i'm not sure of. i'm scared yeah... and the fact that my friends is a "LONG-DISTANCE" phone call away is not actually helping me in embracing tomorrows unavoidable surprises...

*~ciao for now

niXXie

se7en loves me and i <3 him

too blah to...

just wanna post this... this is like my iq since kindergarten... i know the internet result is leik not 100% acurate but even the school iq test thingies i always get 132...

*~ciao for now
niXXie
se7en loves me and i <3 him

i gotta have faith...

yeah it's x-mas from the korean group TRAX. yeah that's it about him. i don't like him... he's alright.. so yeah.

gaah it's been a while since i last wrote here... here is a runthrough of my thoughts within the last few days...

last sunday i felt down and blue... damn DA is erasing deviations for copyright infrigment... curse DA! i was down the whole night! but after waking up the following day i felt better. i realized that if they delated my worx i won't care... i'll just keep posting new ones... haha...

last monday shopping! woohoo! i so love it... greenhills is shopping heaven.. anyways i wasted a few thousand bucks for my own vanity... haha... stress releiver...

yesterday was independence day.. nagpunta dito si azy,., she gave me a copy of gt and sapuri... no more downloading woot!

i'll be working on a translating proj later just for eijii... hehe... that's how much i love you dear... i'll postpone my sapuri watching...

*~ciao for now

niXXie

se7en loves me and i <3 him

while you were sleeping...

see my new avvie in DA... he's hot... bwahaha! yeah... i i was just wanna be the one who took this pic... sadluy i'm noy...*i hope no one is getting any pervy thoughts right now*

woohoo... i'm sleepless and talking to rin chan... happiness ne?

eniweyz one happy thing! i am now a member in talk pinoy! for a very very long time i was just a guest but now i'm a member.

another fun thing i can now right things in hangul... i imy new baby and then i installed some thingies in my new baby then tentenententen... hangul! but i'm not gonna write anything now... next time nalang...

ngayon ang celebration ng 40 days ng lola ko... dapat sa 12 kaso ang magaling na pinuno ng pilipinas ay inurong ang holiday for independence day ginawa nyang monday ang walang pasok. at dahil may kasabihan ang simbahan na bawal ng lunes ginawa namin na linggo. kaya ung 40 days ng lola q ay naging 38 days lang. ang saya...

i got a manicure yesterday... i now have pink french tips...

i made new wallies and avvies... i'll just post the wallies and save the avvies for later.

*~ciao for now
niXXie
se7en loves me and i <3>

slytherin

Which Hogwarts house will you be sorted into?

whenever i take a sorting thing for the four houses i always end up in slytherin... am i that evil?i'm a sltherin girl always was and always will be...

take the test and tell me which house you fall in to.. i took the test because i joined a chatroom in DA [pottershare] and i was asked by [Ride-the-lightning10] if i wanted to be sorted... i said yes.. i was given a choice to either choose a house or take the quiz...

i was curious so i took the quiz... tentenen! slytherin beybe!

*~ciao for now

niXXie

se7en loves me and i <3 him

nagflagceremony aq...

haha it's changmin. yeah it's fast i know. not one of my best but give me a break this is the first gif i made... i didn't want to post this here but i'm currently running out of gifs... i really need to make some more...

i went to my old highschool this morning just to attend the first flag ceremony of the school year... ang saya no? miss ko na agad ang UPIS. don sa canteen tumambay kami. aq si didsz at si dave. xempre ang ingay namin! haha. given nagdrodroga lang kami ni didsz at nagjojowk kami ni dave... o kay saya! sobrang mamimiss ko sila pagdating ko sa LB... di ko na alam kung sino ang katawanan ko ng ganon ung tipong parang wala na bukas...

pause muna... yeah it's madalingaraw but pizzza... ang sarap ng sicillian pizza.. mango tomato and chicken. yum!

after naming mag hagalpakan sa hs.. btw andon ang grades 4-6... nakakaawang hs students may kasamang mga midgets... habang naglalakad papunta sa sakayan ng jeep nakita nami n si tin.. sabi ni dave lakarin nalang daw namin anggang sa opis ni mama... so nagecide kami na dumaan na ng fa papuntang ncpag... xempre ang layo diba. pwera p sa mainit dala ko ung dakila kong laptop... na nigawa ko nang windows vista kagabi... haha

i'm really happy about my deviant art account these days... it seems to be full of life. comments everywhere! thanks for all of you who support my work! even though they're not as great as the others...

haha ang saya hanggang kaninang hapon magkasama kami ni didsz nagdodroga sa office ni mama... damn laptop still won't play my other vids! i need to fix that up soon...

damn i feel so sticky... the temperature is so high! i can' stand it... why does it have to be this friggin hot!?!

*~ciao for now

niXXie

se7en loves me and i <3 him

i've got love...

heechul oppa... i miss him. i'm not getting muchy of suju nowadays... i made this a long long looooong time ago and i noticed that i'm running out of gif's to put here... gaah time to make stocks!!!

i've got a new baby and it's love!!! my dad finally got me a laptop! it's 14.1" dell laptop... heavy but great for dvds... haha! it came with windows xp home ed but i wanted it vista so i upgraded it! and i'm currently lovin it... haha.

i think i did not update my blog here yesterday but i updated my journal in DA.

i'm currently downloading kamenashi's sapuri. it's gonna take me a while to download it. a minimum of 4 more days. and by that as in sleepless days. but a friend in da told me that it is worth the wait. i'm so excited! i'm lovin kame though there are these certain instances tha tells me he is gay but who cares i like him so bite me...

later i got to wake up early. it's the first day of classes for UPIS students. i wanna be there for their first flag ceremony. all the elem kids will be in the hs building because of the renovation so haha... i'll be there!

i wanna see my old school... i miss it already. i miss sexy... haha didsz miss na rin kita! wahaha...oooh i'm gonna burn her some drugs pa nga pala! xet kelangang bumili ng dvdr+ oh well kaya nga may shopping eh... kaso walang pera... bahala na si tarzan! haha...

*~ciao for now
niXXie
se7en loves me and i <3 him

sapuri

wooh look it's se7en! my loves is leik falling for me! nyahaha! this is my gift for having 2k pv in DA... i know 2 k is nothing compared to other deviants 100k but me reaching 2k is something big! so haha...yeah i'm proud!!!

my date to lb is moved i'll be going there on the 16 so my mom could go with me... i;m gonna miss my computer so much since i still don't have a laptop... maybe before june ends i'll have one already.

i'm currently downloading sapuri... haha it's a japanese series where kat-tun's kamenashi is the leading male actor... yeah i'm liking him since i watched nobuta wo produce so bite me... funny thing i think i'll be downloading the series for the next 4 days... haha... i can wait.ü

i made a new joongie wallie look:

everytime you open your computer you see him staring at you like that... aiee it makes me melt everytime i think about it...

before i go se7en made me die but he revived me asap... he sang brian mcknight's incomplete... aieee! the love... as usual his version is veddy veddy fine! hehe i like jaejoong's version but se7en's is liek the bomb!

*~ciao for now
niXXie
se7en loves me and i <3 him

happy birthday yoochunnie!

my third and last post for now... june 4 is yoochun's birthday... happy birthday oppa! i made 3 gifts for him since he is 3 years old in dog years making him 21 years old in human years. the avie you see is my first gift here are the others.

i also made a wallie for kibum oppa.

nothing much... just had fun with colors... haha

oooh i''m done! i can watch house m.d. na! yay!

*~ciao for now
niXXie
se7en loves me and i <3 him

nobuta wo produce

shuji-kun! aiee this series is so cute! i finished the whole sreies in just one sitting. that's 10 episodes of fun totalling 8 hours of none stop cuteness! kame is so kawaii!


here's a better version of that scene... bigger and longer...



aiee! i'm gonna watch the series again! i so love it. it's not mushy but full of crazy friendship. lolsz akira shock! bye-cycle bye-bye-cycle! it's one of those must see jdramas...

*~ciao for now
niXXie
se7en loves me and i <3 him

potsession 2

gaah. it's been a while since i've posted something here... i'm starting to get lazy cause a lot of things happened. must resist laziness... to make up for the days of not posting i'm gonna post 3 entries with different topics... i know the avie is cute... yoochunnie in a photobook...haha.

nung sat. june2... nagpunta kami ni rin at didsz sa quiapo para bumili ng beads para sa hikaw... haha ang iniiit!magkakahangin nga mangangamoy tinaapa ka naman... whaha. nakahanap naman kami ng magagandang cross na beads... ung iba nga may Jesus Christ pa pero di naman nami binili un... lagas lang ng pera eh.

walangya ung tao sa greenwich gusto ko siyang pasabugin.

waah inaantok na ko pero must continue...

ang saya namin sa lrt... drugs! siyempre merong mga taong nakatingin but who cares?

tapos naming magquiapo nagpunta kami sa mcdo for the 'reunion' kuno. ang gandang reunion! ilan ang tao? 7 may kapatid pang kasama don... litse nakita lang namin si ronald mcdonald na mukang bagong facelift eh... nakakatawa.

well after non nagpunta kami sa house ni didsz para kumuha ng souldering iron... haha tas bumili ng fud at nagpunta sa bahay namin... dito kami nagstay magdamag kakagawa ng hikaw at ng iba pang checheburetse,,

nanood kami ng comercials at ng cinderella si didsz tinapos ung grudge na japanese nakatulog kami ni rin eh haha...

the sleepover was fun but we kinda ran out of thingies to do... haha...

kulang din kami sa pics... huhu bakit ganon! di nanaman tau nag pichur pichur!

*~ciao for now

niXXie

se7en loves me and i <3 him

congratulations! APE sucks...

DONG BANG SHIN GI!!!! HWAITING! wahaha... hwaiting. so lame... dumb subbers. but if not for them i would have not laughed so hard. this is like my most famous avvie in DA. TVXQ and their inner dorkyness... how cute.

i know i have just posted some more or less 6 hours back but i just wanna note this down.

congratulations EDGAR on passing the APE on math 14! *APE means advanced placement examination, after passin that exam you are not required to take that subject next sy.* passing the APE means something big! it means that your knowledge about that subject is already college level. coolie. when i read his text message saying he passed i was like so happy for him. specially since i know how hard those effin tests are. well i dunno about math 14 but i took 5 friggin APEs in 3 days. so yeah my brain was drained. specially since i did not review for any of those. and as expected i didn't pass any. so nothing gained nothing lost... haha.

beleive it or not si edgar ay isa sa mga taong mamimiss ko pagdating sa college. sarap kausap nyan eh haha bangag sa bangag. lalo na nung MSI days namin. wahaha!ang daling pakisamahan nyang si mayor. at nakakatuwa ang kanyang sense of humor hindi katulad nung ibang trying hard sa tabi tabi...

before getting a shuteye i watched a few episodes of "rocko's modern life". haha beleive it or not i like that dumb cartoon. spunky heff and filbert. i miss the old days where in during rainy days you could just sit and watch dorky cartoons like 'rocko's modern life' and 'angry beavers'.

anyweys i'm still groggy. i slept during sunrise that's around 5:30am and i woke up around 8:00am making that aproximately 2.5 hours of sleep... my head is gonna hurt like hell...

oh and yesterday i had my nails done! my toenails are like shining blue and my fingernails have black tips with glitter stars...ü pretty.

*~ciao for now

niXXie

se7en loves me and i <3 him

john tucker must die!... mean much...

it's se7en! haha love it or hate it... i like it... wahaha... still my avie in DA... so yeah.ü he's cute, he's hot, he can dance and he can sing... need i say more? he's like a total package!

yeah what i wrote sounds like an advertisment... like i'd wanna sell him.. yeah right! if ever in reality i really as in really own him... no one is alowed to to touch him. and when i say no one i mean NO one but me. *i hope no one is getting any pervy thoughts right now*

but life sucks. i don't own him in this big "REAL" world. but in my own little world he sings me to sleep and dances to me when i feel down and... okei nicole stop revealing the little secrets that goes on in your world... shut up na...

so it's like 2 am and i'm still not going to bed. i need to get up early later cause rin and didsz will be coming before 10 and i need to get ready. ewan bahala na kung saan saan naman aq makakakuha ng energy eh.ü haha plus mukhang pwede ma2log sa aming sleepover. nyaha...

yeah so i mentioned in my previous post that i had a haircut and omg it's short! here's a pic...

yeah the smile is a little akward i know... i was not in a camwhoring mood yesterday. i miss my long hair!my previous hair was long and straight now it's like short and fluffy... the layered thingie makes it look big...

i watched 'john tucker must die' a while ago and i found it very nice... i like the movie. haha. but it does remind me of mean girls. but i like this one better. ashanti acts well. there were a lot of really funny lines in the movie and the part where john tucker had an emotional meltdown during a basketball game due to powdered estrogen was hillarious. though imagining some big fat and old guys wearing thongs is kinda disturbing. the movie is so fun to watch! and it is touching to see that kate made her mom get rid of skip, found real friends, made john tucker honest, and became famous. wow not bad for an invisible person. haha.

even though this entry is already long i can't resist to not put some drugs... so here are seven pictures of my darling se7en... eww i just used the term darling... haha..

i so like these pics! the hotness and the cuteness... ahh *dies* see pluto? the lighting on that pic suck but still pluto and se7en look good together!... i won't comment more because if i go on about him it'll be hard for me to stop...

okei so that's like drugs i know. i promised my self that i won't flood this blog with drugs but i'm kinda breaking that promise. i'll really try and get my lj up and going soon so i can put my collection of drugs there. i have a collection of pictures not less than 500 and it's still growing so yeah... i need a place where it'll be available for those who ask for it...

*~ciao for now

niXXie

se7en loves me and i <3 him